Hey guys, if you’re here, I just want you to know I’m writing this post simply because I want to document the moments that brought this Dragon dress to fruition so that it can live on forever. I feel the moments were so significant that I want it to be something Abigail can come back and read, whenever she gets older, whenever she starts doubting herself, whenever she finds herself confirming to ideals not her own, whenever she feels lost and unsure…she can come back to this post and remember just how SPIRITED and true to herself she was (is) and hopefully she will find her way back to her self. Now, she’s said and done a lot of sweet and amazing things in her short 6 years of life (if you follow me on IG you know this already) – but I feel like these specific moments were truly significant and I hope they are cornerstones that help guide her into the person she is meant to be.
Alright, now for story time:
Time: Monday, September 17, 2018.
So we’re walking down the aisle of Joann’s looking for fabric for me (I know its a shocker! but I’ll make a special post all about that next), and she spots this Dragon fabric, and the convo goes like this:
Her: “This is sooooooooooo cute! Can I have it mommy please?!?!? Please?! PUHLLEESSE! Green Day is Friday and I can wear it then!”
Me: “Okay #1, remember…we are not here for you, we are here for me. And #2, I wasn’t planing on sewing anything for Green Day…..you have a bunch of green tops plus that green uniform polo I just bought!”
Her: “Please?! Look it has Dragons! AND REMEMBER I’M A DRAGON BABY!” – [ Backstory: A couple months ago, on the rare occasion that all 4 of us get to have breakfast together, we got to talking about Chinese Zodiac signs, and we went through what each of us was. She was born in the Year of the Dragon.]
Me: *trying to deflect* “You sure those aren’t Dinosaurs?…They look like Dinosaurs.”
Her” *frustrated sigh* “They. Are. Dragons. Cute ones. Can I have it please?”
Me: *still distracted looking for fabric for me*: “We’ll see, just put it in the cart.”
Her: “Yay! Thank you Mommy!” …no more than 5 steps later …”OH MY GOSH!!!!! LOOOOOOOOOOOKKKK ITS UNNNIIIIIIICCCOOOORRRNNNN FABRIC!!!!!!!” Oh my gosh! I love it! AND IT HAS GREEN! Can I have it too mom! Please!?”
Me: *feeling the annoyance building* “Seriously?! How is it that you’re the one putting fabric in the cart for yourself, when we’re here shopping for me? I still haven’t found anything I like yet. You can’t get both. One of the other.”
Her: *stands there and ponders back and forth between the two* …”Well I love Dragons, and I realllllyyyyy love Unicorns….and I think if I wear the dragons to school maybe the girls will say “why are you wearing dragons? Just like they say bow ties are for boys every time I wear them.”
*I stop browsing and turn to her preparing in my head to say something meaningful and profound like she shouldn’t care what other people think, but before I could get any of it out she says*
Her: “But I LIKE WHAT I LIKE, and I really like these Dragons! They don’t have to like them right? Cause I like what I like. Look, they are soooo cute! Let’s get the Dragons!”
So we left the store with Dragons and still no fabric for me. lol
But wait, the story doesn’t end there! lol. In my head I thought I’d make her a cute little cardigan, so I picked up some solid blue to use as the some contrast for the neck and arm binding too. Fast forward to yesterday, she sees me looking at patterns and says:
Her: “Mommy, can you make a dress this time?”
Me: “Uhhhh…. I was actually thinking a cardigan would be cute. Here, look at this pattern.”
Her: *unwavered*: “No, can I have a dress please? When my friends see dragons on my dress, I can say, see dragons can go on dresses! And the girls can see its okay to wear dragons if they want to, or blue if they want to, or green if they want to because those are things and colors boys think only they can wear. Not all the boys though, but just most of them.”
Me: “Okay, ….well umm…I guess I can find dress. It will just be hard, because I think anything other than a cardigan will look like you’re wearing pajamas to school….but I can look.”
Her: “…..so can I see what patterns you have?”
And we sat there for what felt like forever as I went through all the patterns I had on my hard drive, then we went to my Pinterest board so she could see all the dresses I’ve made for her so far…when we came upon the Willow Dress from Bubby and Me Creations that I made in 2016 she was adamant that that was the one. By this time I was so over trying to find a pattern and was just happy that she had made a decision, if it ended up looking like pajamas…then so be it. lol So I printed the pattern, taped it up, cut all the pieces out and started sewing…but it wasn’t until I was half way done with the bodice…it dawned on me that the flutters looked like dragon wings so I called her over and I said:
Me: “Hey check this out! The flutters look like dragon wings, they match!”
And she looks at me and says, in the most “duh” tone ever: “Yes mommy, that’s why I picked that pattern.” and then she skipped off into her room again.
I had nothing else to say, but I sure did have a lot to feel.
Now… I know to most, these conversations seem normal, to most these conversations are typical 6 year old banter, BUT they were not for ME at 6 yr old. I was never as courageous, confident or strong willed at this age; and so for her to display these attributes I only just acquired as an adult, is so amazing to me. And remember, when we found out we were pregnant, I wanted a boy. True story, up until she was born, I wanted another boy….I was soooo terrified of having a girl, because I knew first hand all the struggle she would have to go through in life. Now, I’m still worried for her…EVERYDAY….but I’ll tell you this: I’m not AS worried for her as I anticipated I would have been.
At 6 years old, she is comfortable in her skin and has the courage enough to walk into a school full of kids who question her sense of style, who might think she’s weird because she takes every opportunity to express her creativity with what she chooses to wear, and still be completely unbothered. [I hope that this quality stays with her FOREVER.] – ps. she styled herself too!
At 6 years old, she’s capable of envisioning an end goal and then putting two and two together to get there. I mean seriously…I NEVER SAW WINGS IN THOSE FLUTTERS! But she did. And to be quite honest, the more I look at the pattern print, the more I wonder how come it didn’t hit me before?! How come I couldn’t see it? lol
At 6 years old, she doesn’t settle. She’s proactive. She wanted a dress. She asked for a dress, she explained why it was a good idea and she made sure she sat down and looked at all the patterns with me to be sure she got a dress in the end.
At 6 years old, she runs toward the challenge to be the change, to set a new example, to care enough to be proactive and to be a leader and to show her friends it’s okay to like what they like too.
After I was finished with the dress, we tried it on, and I told her that I was really proud of how confident she was and that she choose something because she wanted to wear it and not because it was the popular thing…..and you know what she said, she said:
“I know. Thanks for making me this dress, you’re the perfect mommy for me.”
And I gotta tell you that was like a sucker punch right in the gut! lol…I’ll never forget it. And she’s right, I always tell my husband, I don’t think I would have discovered my love and passion for sewing the way I do now if she didn’t come along.
She’s every bit of what I wish I was at 6 yrs old, and I hope that when she does loose her way (because we all do) she’ll have these moments to help guide her back.
And I’ll leave you with this:
I know every parent thinks their child is special, and THEY ARE RIGHT! They totally are. And it’s important as parents, that when we see these wonderful attributes played out by our children, we speak on it. While they are just being themselves, it’s important that they know what their good attributes are and more so that they KNOW that WE RECOGNIZE these things in them and that we think they are pretty awesome. In the years to come, when they find themselves at the crossroads, our voices will be the inner voices that they hear, so we need to make sure its more on the side of positivity than it is negative.
And thats it for this post, …thank you for reading this far and thank you for stopping by, I hope that you have a wonderful day! xoxo